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i trust people too much.

sometimes i got stress over a little things.  seriously, i relieved that there people that said -- are you okay ? its okay. people make mistake. lets start again. ill be here. anytime you need me. i know you have been quiet. you're not you are. i see you change.  and there must be something that bother your mind. its okay. now let it go. let the pain go.

i trust people too much.  take them for granted.  but when it is time for them to protect me. they gone. totally don't bother anything happens to me.
and people said -- you need friends in life. quality over quantity is always the best.
if you know how i can protect/ worries about them,  you will wonder why they still betray me.  you will :))

can i discipline myself ? financial and routine?

hate.

I admit that most of the time i really disappointed with people.  -- including me. my heart fragile most of the time. -- i mean really fragile. -- about anything and everything.
i wonder where myself goes -- the one that everyone outside see.
when i'm alone, i feel that everything i do and said  -- all useless. stupid.  -- i hurt people.
and i hate myself for this.  i hope i run from myself. so, people will not disappointed with me. 
Sometimes, i just desperate for someone to listen, about everything that i really want to say.

ended of first year bachelor.

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Assalamualaikum and haiiiii everyone!
Alhamdulillah. After a long journey until i survive here. currently at University Malaysia Perlis and just ended my first year bachelor's life. getting through this thick and tough journey will make me stronger after this. Even i'm not get opportunity to studies oversea that i admired after a long time, i realize it doesn't care where you study but how you make it clear to your self to survive in this journey.
Just another 2 years more babe. you will make it and graduate. oh my God, i just can't wait! Starting my internship for another 2 weeks after we celebrate Raya Day! really nervous and i don't know what i have to do and really sick thinking of that coming soon! i even didn't excited to celebrate Raya, no new clothes and just wear what i have. i think this is just enough and i really grateful my parents still alive.
oh wait! i decide to share with you my first year journey in university. enjoy!

Wearing my uniform while …

hurts.

assalamualaikum. hi. im back gais. ya, awkward sikit sebab dah lama tak menulis. aku menulis bila aku kecewa abt something or i have something that i cant describe with my words so i write.
im abt stress with my self. feeling unwanted and want go far away from them. i dont know what to say but they dont even understand. i dont like they bother with what i do. 
if they really want me to change. they stay. they show me whats wrong.
im hurts babe.  really. with everything and everyone.

habis matrik daaa !

assalamualaikum. hi guys. apa khabar korang ? aku baik baik je kat sini. lama jugak aku tak update lepas aku habis matrikulasi. batch baru pun dah masuk. result final? Alhamdulillah. lepas target aku. Insha Allah, jika masih ada peluang aku akan smabung belajar lagi untuk improve aku punya skills.
alhamdulillah. aku dah mula kerja kat 7Eleven. everything okay, just sometimes aku koyak sikit sebab ayat deep orang kat aku. tak apa , kita mana boleh sama kan starting point kita dengan orang. just ingat, jangan pernah tinggi diri atau sombong. kalau ada pun dalam diri tu sifat semula jadi dimata orang kita ni berlagak, lawan balik perasaan kita and try to be friendly :)
just because im easily fall in love with a guy. i found something that make me think before fall in love with someone. if that guy not good enough, can't pray 5 times a day i have to think if i want my childrens be like him? okay no. aku pun tunggang terbalik lepastu nak depend dengan someone yang tunggang terbalik ju…

kelab pendidikan luar di matrikulasi.

Assalamualaikum.dah sudah pertengahan semester dua di matrikulasi dan alhamdulillah aku still boleh survive dalam kelompok yang pandai. even sebenarnya aku ni takla pandai mana pun. macam cikgu aku cakap " mana ada orang pandai dalam dunia ni. rajin dengan tak rajin je."

semester dua ni, aku ada subjek koko. jadi untuk koko aku pilih kelab pendidikan luar @ rekreasi. dalam kelab ni banyak juga aku belajar. bukan setakat teori tapi untuk keyakinan diri juga. macam hari ni, kelab aku buat flying fox. walaupun ada sikit kemalangan tapi aku still proud of myself.

aktiviti hujung minggu ni, kelab aku ada pi pantai keracut. aku dengar nama pantai keracut tu, aku just rilek ja sebab pantai kan. ingat nak have fun sikit daripada penat study. pastu semalam ada meeting, aku dengar cikgu cerita jalan yang akan kami lalui. 2 jam setengah saja jalan pi pantai. hasrat aku nak pi pun macam pudar tak pudar ja.

member aku sorang dah left group dah. pastu aku decide untuk pi ja. aku dah penat…